Saturday, July 25, 2015

Walang forever

I have been very quiet these past few months. I have been busy with work primarily and during my free time I would really rather to detach from the world and sleep. Everything just seemed right: the usual stress from commuting and work, spending days with Joms, movies and dining out.

Joms works as a Trainer somewhere in QC. For the last three years that we have been together, I have never really questioned his loyalty. I am very much aware how we started. He was the one who wanted to change what we are and worked hard to prove that he is trustworthy. We worked on that trust part. I spilled all the dirty deeds and secrets together with my hopes and dreams. Here again is my broken heart. Please don't make a burger out of it.

Just when I thought I've done everything right and I am the happiest point in my life compared to all my previous relationships... this happened.

Siguro dapat nilinaw ko talaga muna ang lahat.

Minsan tinanung ko si Joms:

Seth: Bakit mo ako mahal?

Joms: Kasi nagkaron tayu ng spark. Hindi ko talaga alam kung bakit at ayaw ko na malaman kasi kapag ganun baka magbago isip ko or something.

Tumigil na ako noon.

Honestly I didn't see it coming.

What I did notice was that:

He suddenly became "happier"
There was always a reason to stay longer in the office
He always hanged out with this "Wave" that was the coolest he met (according to him)
They have this group chat on Viber and his phone keeps on beeping

I sensed something weird but I usually let it pass. I never checked his phone or messages. I never had the reason to.

However, this bond seemed to excessive between a Trainer and his class.

And so one day after coming home from work, I saw him in bed asleep and decided to check his phone once and for all. Yes there was a group chat. Until I checked this private conversation with a guy named Patrick.

My heart died with every scroll on the message thread.

I remembered him saying: "We have this two people that we teased until they finally admitted they liked each other..."

Little did I know he was referring to himself.

I took photos. Sent them to several people. Confronted him.

He didn't think I was serious. "Wala lang daw yun"

Until I told him I read the private chat he had with all the sweet nothings, the memories, and the agreement to wear a couple outfit.

Seth is sad.

and is still sad until now...


  1. Putangina. Isang malutong na 'putangina' para sa kanilang dalawa. Sorry, ayaw kong i-censor ang mura ko dahil naiinis ako para sa'yo. Alam kong aware siya sa nangyari sa'yo dati with one of your exes, kaya sobrang foul para ulitin niya sa'yo yung ganoon. Putangina talaga, Seth.

    Habang binabasa ko yung post mo at tinitignan ko yung mga screenshot, sumisikip ang dibdib ko. Naiiyak ako na ewan para sa'yo. Hindi ko ma-imagine kung sa akin mangyari yan; mababaliw siguro ako. *sigh*

  2. You deserve someone who is fully aware of every single reason he loves you. I'm so sorry this happened though. I'm crossing my fingers for your happiness, Seth.

    And yeah, Joms deserves a broken ribcage.

  3. I've been in that exact same position. I wanted to stop reading thru the messages but my fingersjust kept on scrolling. I felt my body go numb, like each message was a stab in my heart.

    Sending you virtual hugs :(

  4. This would be rich coming from me, I've never been the perfect boyfriend but I have to say this,

    my heart shattered.

    I want to give you a hug.

  5. you don't deserve him seth

  6. Ang landi.
    Masyadong malandi.

    Paano pa nga ba mapagkakatiwalaan yan?

  7. wake up... just, wake up...

  8. There maybe forever but it will be one in a million/s...

    but still there is... a very rare great loyal match...

    That person do not deserve the "forever thing" even a "love" of someone... a "cheater" like that is a great waste of time and effort...